My life has been busy.
This past week has been crazy. Summer itself has been crazy.
Health problems are looming around me, but I am finding comfort in God, my daughter and my church sisters. "God and the girls" are holding me together no doubt.
I cried in church today during worship. The lyrics were really powerful. Then our Pastor got up and said "You are not alone in this battle."
That hit me hard. I wrote that on the top of my notes and highlighted it. I tried to continue to focus on the sermon, God helped me do that. Because this sermon (and the whole entire series I am sure) was really, really good.
I have to keep an upbeat spirit. I have cried so much this week, that between the heat and my tears, I am surprised my skin and bones haven't turned back into dust and returned to the earth. 😀
I joke, because I want to joke.
I joke, because I have to joke.
Otherwise I will lose it for sure.
I looked at some cars this weekend.
I was so excited to see that my credit score was 100 points higher than the last time I looked at it. Which, to be honest, was about 5 years ago. I am not in the "good" credit area, but at least I am out of the "you've got to be kidding me, you want credit with that" score.
I am in the "we will loan you money to purchase a car that runs and has air conditioning" credit score.
I will count my blessings. Thank you Jesus for that.
Counting blessings is good.
Counting my blessings is what keeps me going every day.
I will say that I am blessed with a community of people who I never realized how much they cared about me. And some folks, I never realized just how much I meant to them.
I'm just little old me.
Nothing special really. I'm not famous, I'm not by any means a model or some type of doctor or nurse or police officer.
I'm just me.
And somehow, God brought into my life(and brought me into the lives of) people who are genuinely there for me in good times and in not so good times. I have this little community of folks who love God as much as I do, and we all seem to bear each others burdens when they arise.
We laugh together.
Worship together.
Cry together.
And hold one another accountable when we need to.
I love all of them.💜
I don't want to dwell on my "health issue", however, I will say the dizziness is a lot more frequent and I'm not quite sure if that dizziness is related to the other thing that has been bothering me. I have a second appointment with another doctor in a few days who is going to examine something to see if I need anything further to be done with this stupid thing.
I hate having to go to the doctor. If it wasn't so freaking expensive I may have gone a lot more often. I may have kept this body of mine in pristine condition if my deductible wasn't $1,000 and every visit in between and test and x-ray and labs needed to be done adding even thousands more to the medical bank and less in mine.
It's not cheap.
But not maintaining is probably going to cost me a lot more.
And to be quite honest I am scared.
This blog is my therapy.
I have another blog that I really need to start posting on again as well, but life has been busy as I said before and I just wanted to post this, because a year from now, I want to see this and look back and thank God for the blessing me of giving me another year here on earth.
Ugh.
Whoever reads this...thanks for listening.
Whoever responds and comments, thanks even more.
God is with me.
It's going to be okay.
It's going to be okay...
